More Alike Than Different
In 2019 my wife, Pearlene, was inspired to write a children’s book premised on the notion that people have far more in common than what differentiates us. She drew upon her childhood experiences as a blond-haired, blue-eyed German Canadian child. In contrasting my experiences as a Jamaican immigrant, she marvelled at how she was exposed to the beauty of human diversity when her parents welcomed visitors from around the world to their home.
Recently, I was in a business meeting where someone lamented that our socio-cultural path appears to be accentuating our differences rather than celebrating the traits and qualities that unite us as members of humanity. That resonated with me. I know it may be a point of hot debate and consternation for some. I understand and appreciate such a reaction. There are many valid perspectives to entertain on this.
We must never forget the atrocities visited upon countless members of the human family. We are witnessing the trauma of past events in generations today. Many are caught within the recurring rip tides of a painful and tragic history. We are all called to throw out a lifeline in thoughts and deeds. We must make amends, and we must determine to do better. I carry my own haunted past of ethnic and cultural wounds leaving scars on my spirit. These have moulded me in many ways and have informed my perspective of what it means to be human.
I also carry a fierce knowledge and awareness of my worth, instilled by my grandparents during my childhood in Jamaica. No amount of social propaganda could erode the sense of self their loved seeded in me. No matter the insult directed at my skin colour, I never questioned the beauty and uniqueness of my hue. I pitied those whose eyes failed to see me for who I was.
Rather than wallowing in their insults, I reminded myself of who I was and moved past them to higher ground. I never held myself above anyone, but I was never beneath anyone either. As the years steadily passed, I became aware of a growing social restlessness consuming us with a focus on what separates us. It has become so enmeshed in all we are that I wonder if we recognize our rush to proclaim and our haste to defame. When I first arrived in Canada over 45 years ago, the prevailing narrative was one of tolerance. I was not fond of that tact. I did not want to be tolerated for my differences. I wanted to be celebrated for who I was, as I, in turn, celebrate others.
When we stop to examine what defines us as human beings, colour, nationality, cultural expression, and the other social constraints placed upon us pale in comparison to the many traits that unite us. That’s what my wife was trying to get at with her children’s book. That’s what I believe the speaker was alluding to in our meeting. We should never forget the uniqueness of our backgrounds.
But I wonder what we might achieve with a collective focus on the traits that bind us. What hurdles might we overcome with soothing words and thoughtful and compassionate deeds? We may surprise ourselves by finding that we have accomplished something that no other generation in history has; a true awakening of our collective potential. I fear we are in a moment in time when we may be allowing our individuality to trump all that we share as humans. In doing so, are we losing sight of what truly unites us? Let me repeat it; we are more alike than different. I’d love to know what you think.